There have been joyous announcements of new babies being born and birthdays such as our son who is now 35. I can't believe I've been a mom that long.
And then, there is the anguish I see going on all around me. Not only have we seen what's going on in France and all the hurt and fear there but my cousin passed away Monday. That same day, our daughter's twin friends lost their grandmother. And now, the hardest one to process is the passing away of a young girl. This is a child of one of "my" girls. That's what I called the girls to whom I was 'youth sponsor' for back in the 80s and early 90s.
Sometimes I worry that I am not able to feel, let alone show, empathy, or sympathy or any emotion at the hurts and struggles of others.
But this one has hit me hard and there lies the reason for my turmoil today. I have not seen Shannon since she was a teenager. She has since gotten married, had beautiful children and lived in London. A lot of life lived since I've seen her. But when I heard that her children were diagnosed with this awful disease, Sanfillipo dusease, a genetic disease that is a death sentence for the children, I started following her blog. How does one live with something like this? With fear and anger and determination to provide the best for her children. With faith. And with grace is how Shannon has and is living through this awfulness. And because of that, I've followed her journey. I haven't met this sweet child of hers or her son, but, through their story, I've found I do have the capacity for hurting for someone else.
My soul has been crying out in "groans that words cannot express" for this family. There's her parents, her brother, aunt and uncles and grandparents all feeling this awful loss of a life that was very hard. (and yes, even the family dog is hurting) and I hurt for them. As a grandmother myself, I can not imagine the pain of not only losing my grand-daughter but, the hurt I would feel for my child also. That's what we as moms do. We hurt when our children hurt. And so, we hurt for them and for us.
But, I believe that Waverly is with the Lord now. And her life has just gotten so much better! She would not want to come back here for anything! She is not missing anyone here in this place we call home for a short while. She is not missing her wheelchair. She only has eyes for the Savior. If only we lived this life with eyes only for the Savior, we wouldn't have all the fear, anger, pain, sorrow, heartache, etc that we have here. But until we are in his presence, we can not quite carry that off. We will, though, one day when we finally are called home!!! And oh, how I long for that day!
I can see things from her side because I once longed to go home. God has called Waverly home! She is free from the shackles of this life! She is free from pain, free to walk and talk and dance and praise her heavenly Father. Her life has been touched by the love of a wonderful earthly father who has been by his daughter's side through all her struggles. She was taught well what the love of a father is and now she is in the arms of her heavenly Father who is infinitely more praiseworthy than we can think of or dream!
I have been feeling lately that we ought as believers to be joyous when someone,gets to go home. I do not believe in saying, oh that's such a shame. I see it as a wonderful thing for them. I found I do feel pain for others, because I am hurting for those who have lost loved ones. God has asked a huge sacrifice of the life the McNeils had planned. And oh I can not imagine the pain they are feeling right now! They will never stop loving or missing Waverly. And the worst part is that they will have to go through this all over again. With their precious son. And so, while feeling a sense of joy that this child's struggle is over my heart is breaking for her parents. Her grandparents. Her brother.
With all the death going on in this world my dear Christian brothers and sisters, we need not grieve for the departed, we grieve for their loved ones and our loss of someone so precious to us. I need not pray for Waverly anymore, she's home with the savior, I pray for her loved ones. I need not pray for cousin Jim but I pray for his loved ones. I need not pray for the twin's Nonni, but I pray for the family. I do not pray for those Christians who are losing their life around the world but I pray for their loved ones.
I pray God's loving arms encircle and carry them through the days ahead. I pray that the Lord would envelope them with the "peace that passes all understanding" to carry them through this time. And Lord, I pray that you would be with Shannon and Matt esp as they go on without their dear child and as they continue to love and care for their beloved son. I pray for Oliver as he probably doesn't understand what's happening in his life. I pray that your desire is to give the McNeils as much time as possible with Oliver.
As someone who has begged, literally, begged God to take me home, and then experienced his miraculous healing I have a new outlook on life. At the point of my healing I felt such a closeness to the Father that I felt almost singed by his touch. I long for that again when I get Home. Some day. As a child of the Creator God through my faith in his son and his work on the cross, I know that if I am not here on this earth any longer, I will be in my Father's arms in heaven. That's his promise. But for now He wants me to stay here on this earth and I'm enjoying the life he's given me. I am enjoying being a mother and grandmother. I am so very thankful to be well enough to help my mom when she needs me.
I am not afraid of what the evil one has planned in this world, his world, because I know that when I leave this earthly body, I will be in glory! I need not be afraid but diligent to do the father's work which is why he said no when I begged. And what I need to be about. And, I think that His greatest will for me is to love, yes love even those who want to do us harm.
Lord, I pray that you would use the turmoil in this world to grant to others repentance that they too may one day Dance with You in heaven!
But for now, I am still grieving for this young family. While I rejoice with Waverly for her freedom.
Hosea 6:1 Come, let us return to the Lord for he is good.
Acts 2:38
Peter replied, “Repent and be baptized, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. And you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit.
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