Memories of Christmas' Past

Traditions

Why oh why did I push myself so much when my kids were little to make the 'perfect' celebration for them!?  I cringe when I think of all the lost time I didn't have to spend with my kids because I was soo soo busy making sure they had the 'perfect' Christmas with plenty of tradition! 
  One year, maybe the second one I had RSD, I thought...'There is no way I can do all the things I used to do for Christmas.  I got a brainstorm: ask each of our dear offspring and my husband what was their favorite tradition, cookie, baked good that makes Christmas Christmas for them.'  'Huh?'  That's the reaction I got from probably three out of the five!  So, I repeated myself, giving a little help.    Ok, I mean like, if you don't have cut out cookies, or russian tea balls, or choco chip cookies, you just won't be satisfied with Christmas! 
  Where oh where was my mind?  I was so wrapped up in the stuff of Christmas that I actually was worried that if I didn't make or bake each of their favorites, their Christmas would be ruined!!!!  
 TRADITIONS!!!  They can be wonderful and yet, they can ruin Christmas when seen through the twisted mind of a mother bent on making memories for her children. 
   Come along on my memory lane on my Christmases past and present.   

Gifts

Oh and gifts galore!!! I remember one Christmas when hubs and I were up till 5:30 wrapping the gifts only to get two hours of sleep before the first kid was awake.  ME!!! I couldn't wrap a single present for our children and hubby until Christmas Eve after they went to bed.  I had to lay them all out on the bed in piles, one for each person in the family.  For each of two years, we had a fourth child, a teenage girl.  I'd have a pile for her too.  Every present for one child had a 'corresponding' present for the others.  Pricewise, that is.  We(I) somehow made sure that the cost of said presents and the number of presents was the same for each and every child.  We've been known to switch some things around from child to child and just simply not give one or two if it was unbalanced somehow!! They each also got some clothes, underwear and socks.  Usually a pajama outfit also. They even had to get the same number of stocking stuffers, again, spending roughly the same for each.
   Hubby would be the one tracking the money most of the time.  He always wanted to include the taxes and I didn't want to cause it took too much of my budget up.

Stockings

One tradition that came out of the age old problem that everyone runs into I think.  There are those who just would rather sleep a while longer than get up and open their presents!  This was our family tradition on both sides, one we liked keeping.   Probably about the time my oldest was 16, we started a new tradition in our family.  Those (many years we had grandparents with us also on Christmas Morning) who were up and ready to descend those magically lit stairs before everyone else was ready; could run down and cut their stocking off the banister.  (no fireplace back then).  That gave you one peek at the massive pile of gifts under the tree.  Then you scampered back up the steps to open your stocking stuffers.  Some years my kids were more enthralled with their stocking gifts than anything big under the tree.  I used to, BRSD (before RSD, know how to choose great stocking stuffers.  I don't remember what I'd put in them, but after I was told that, I never quite met the mark again! 

Ornaments

Another tradition that I used to do was make an ornament for the teachers as a Christmas gift. I'd also make new ornaments for our every other year Theme Tree.  Our offspring didn't appreciate them much, but I did. I got bored with the same old ornaments each year! Just think of how many teachers etc this could entail in one year for three kids!!   There were three school teachers, but also the gifted teachers, three more.  Sunday school teachers...three,s ometimes more if there were helpers or co teachers.  Pioneer Boys and Girls leaders...two boys, one girl and there were usually two teachers in each group. Total for wednesday night...six.  Then the piano teacher, coaches, riding instructor...neighbors...friends.  EVERYONE absolutely HAD TO GET A GIFT!!!!

Baking/Candy

  I already mentioned my questioning of my semi grown children about their memories of what made Christmas for them when it came to the things I baked each year.   At one point in my madness, I was making Nestle's Choco chip (that's the only cookies my family ever had so it's a must for me! :) Russian Tea Balls (me again), Green Spritz Trees (for my hubby), Peanut Butter (again, hubs), more Nestle's Choc chip cause we'd have eaten all the rest before the week before Christmas! YES I froze them!!  Do you have any idea how wonderful Chocolate Chip cookies are frozen???? Almost my favorite way to eat them!  :)  Lets see, can't remember if there were any other cookies...I wasn't a cookie queen, left that to my MIL.  She could have won awards with her cut out cookies which were near perfection!  I found out her secret to perfectly baked cookies! She washed the pans each and every time they came out of the oven.  Oh of course she would take the cookies off first!
   I had to make mini loaves of banana bread, cranberry bread and pumpkin bread to give as gifts also and regular size to have Christmas Eve and through out the week after Christmas. I also made fudge.  For many years, I made Moravian Sugar Mints And towards the end, BRSD, I added Chocolate covered Pretzels which were undoubtedly everyone's favorite item from my kitchen! They were also the easiest, so I dropped all else in favor of the pretzels! 

   Christmas Trees

   I could go on and on about Christma Tree traditions but let me just say.  We have bought trees from every type of purveyor of Christmas trees.    We had a good thing going when the kids were little and BRSD.  We went out and hiked around fields of growing trees to find the perfect one to chop down!  It was a really fun family tradition that bit the dust the year after (A)RSD.  We moved soon after the onset of RSD.  That first Christmas in our new area we took the kids to one of those corner Christmas Tree Lots.  Our wonderful teens were enthralled!  You mean, you don't have to go walking around among live trees looking for the perfect tree?  This is cool! So, thus ended another tradition!
 

Triming the Tree

The thing about Christmas trees is that no one in our family actually LIKES decorating them!  When we had our first child, I told my husband that we were going to have a tradition in our house!  I was going to be in the kitchen baking cookies while Dad and children decorated the tree.  It was brilliant!! The house would smell heavenly with the scent of baking cookies and Christmas music in the air!  Well, it really is better to have these plans when the main person doing the work, dad, is on board. 

    A few years ARSD, to walk my fine line I realized I needed to get my family to help more with getting the house ready for Christmas. So, I said, I will not be decorating the tree. We purchased a tree, my hubby put the lights on the tree and NOT ONE OF MY FAMILY PUT ANY ORNAMENTS ON THAT TREE!! Guess they showed me that they weren't going for this bit of mom needing help!

  That's right, we didn't have any ornaments on the tree that year and we had another year like that.  The year we moved to PGH, our realtor and her boss brought us a Christmas Tree on Christmas Eve! What a lovely gesture since we had moved on the 10th and had decided no tree.  We never did decorate that tree either!

   

Christmas Morning

    I also remember a Christmas morning when my boys, probably ages 3 and 2, SLEPT IN on Christmas morn! The joke was on me!!! I was awake by their normal time to rise and yell BREFAST READY MOMMY? But, they were not up!! Hubs held me off from waking them up for half an hour and then I could stand it no longer! hahaha!!!!

Traditions!

   Traditions are wonderful! Don't get me wrong, I love Traditions!  However, to walk my fine line, I"ve learned that it didn't matter if I got everything done, if the tree was even decorated. It didn't matter if I hadn't slept for a couple of days...Christmas morning still rose and we sang Happy Birthday Jesus at breakfast over a coffee cake.  That's what made Christmas.  Our family tradition was to have a coffee cake (Entenmens) for everyone's birthday. So, it seemed natural to have one for Jesus too!  If I forget the coffee cake I feel like I've been gyped. Or rather, I've gyped the ONE who came to save my soul by giving His Life! 

Happy Birthday Jesus!

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!

Well another  year is almost over.  This year, we didn't have to travel far, didn't have to grocery shop, didn't have to cook, and didn't have to entertain.  I LOVE DOING all those things, but to tell you the truth, the best and only way for me to stay on the tightrope by the end of the day TDAY I should always avoid those things!! But, since I like most moms, end up doing the cooking on Tday, we need to find ways to stay balanced. 

The trick is...to learn your limits. 
Go slower.
Clean a week in advance
or
Get a cleaning lady!
Have spouse do the shopping.
Guests....make sure you invite guests who will help.  Like my bro and his wife.  If you invite them, they take over the kitchen when the meal is done and in about ten minutes have it all cleaned up for you! So, people like that are great ones to invite! :)

BUT MOSTLY... 
It's best to use the

KISS

Method of entertaining!

KEEP IT SIMPLE SILLY! 

Thankful!

I posted this on a friend's blog and thought..hmm...I should post it here too! 

I've got a lot to be thankful for this year, including your book and seminar,

The Emotionally Destructive Relationship. 

This morning, I was eating some grapes and I thought;

'Lord, thank you for GRAPES!'

They are a simply wonderful gift from our Father!

Sweet. and/or Sour. Juicy. Cruncy. Handy. Portable.

We can eat em as is or make

Jelly. Jam. Juice. Wine. Chicken Salad.

So, I'll say it again...

Thank you dear Lord for your gift of

GRAPES!

November 23, 2010 12:27 AM



The Princess and the Pea

Have you ever felt like you were the Princess in the old children's story The Princess And The Pea?  Apparently, they put a pea under a huge pile of peas and she had to climb up and lay on the top and if she felt the pea, it meant she truly was a princess.

I MUST BE A PRINCESS!  haha!  I can feel the tiniest creases in my sheets.  I wear my socks inside out as a general rule to keep the seam from hurting my toes!  When I wear long johns, I wear them inside out also!

Just another way to balance the pain and discomfort. 

I wear the tops of socks on my wrists because that was the first place the RSD hit me.  I have found that if I keep an extra layer on my wrists, almost year round, they don't hurt nearly as much or sometimes not at all.  But if I just wear two or even three shirts or sweaters I still have that bone chilling coldness in my wrists. They hurt, sting, ache, feel cold to the bone.  An extra layer just on that most sensitive area helps tremendously!  Try it sometime! I sometimes have to wear my sock tops only on my ankles also because the same thing can happen to them in extreme cold.  Has to have an extra layer right in that area!  Weird, I know.  Aren't we so very strange anyway? 

Fell Off the Rope

Ok, so I fell off my tight rope this week! Hubby and I had gotten so used to living on the rope that we(I) got a bit careless and forgot to keep my balance. This Fall, my week has shaped up to be something like this:
Church
Small Group
Bible Study which requires a minimum of 3.5 hrs of study every other week.
Chiro. 2x a week
Dinner out usually once a week.
Saturdays Hubby is home and we generally do a few things together.
I do some 'busy work' for a friend every few weeks.
I like making meals for sick friends and new moms.
Oh and I foster Bichon Frises. I have one and take in a second one. Mine was practically Rxed by two of my doctors who told hubby that I really could use a dog for a companion.

My stamina and pain relief has been increasing over the past few years. But this new schedule is a bit much for me already. Also, I think the pain in my hip is getting worse. There was one pain I had that the Chiro has almost completely obliterated and a related pain that is very much decreased. Apparently, I was all messed up in that area of my anatomy.

Up until the past couple of years, we knew I could usually do one night out a week. One weekend a month at most we could go away somewhere. We had no social life to speak of and so, it was easy to stay at home. And I didn't go to Bible Study, the Chiro, or do anything for anyone else. We had a nice easy going life carved out for us...boring for most people, but I don't like to be in pain, so I limit my activites. Not only do I not like to be in pain, I am an awful grouch (I don't use the word that really describes what I was like when the pain was unrelieved). Well, not so nice I guess once I realized that one of my meds was not doing it's job the way it should and was actually causing me to have stomach aches and lose weight.
Hence, living on a tight rope! I do too much, I fall off. (have a flair) I do too little and I swell up and get stiff.

I changed one of my meds a year or two ago and the difference is amazing. I'll tell you about that in the next post.

A few weeks ago, I was invited to a girl's night out! I have not been invited on a girl's outing in a long long long time! It was supposed to be on Saturday night, last night. I was pretty psyched about going and getting to know these ladies better. I couldn't go. I hadn't been watching my balance this past week, having had dinner out thurs night and then, friends asked if we'd be interested in going out to dinner and then going to a play with them. I was in such incredible pain during the play I couldn't hardly pay attention. Thank the Lord it was a fun engaging show. I didn't sleep that night at all and realized when I woke up that I'd lost my balance and fallen off my rope. I still had to do stuff here at the house and forgot to put my pain pill in my medicine sorter! YEOW!!!! I believe that my pain meds were masking this awful pain in my hip! After going two nights without my pain pill, this dragon of pain was set free!! Once you let pain get out of control, it's very hard to get back under control again without some sort of intervention. Interestingly enough, the RSD hasn't flared that I've noticed. I couldn't go to church this AM either! Bummer!


I've had to suck it up and give up a few things in my schedule to try and get back in balance.

Have you ever been on pain meds and not until they are starting to wear off do you feel the pain of something like an ear infection? My ear drum burst once upon a time because I couldn't feel the pain till it was too late! I'm pretty sure that even tho I was feeling this pain in my hip, it wasn't nearly as bad as it is now! Whatever is causing this pain is either progressing or the meds were masking. Whatever; I've got to get this under control once again. Well...not yet cause this week is Thanksgiving and we are traveling, it will take at least a week to recover and then we go right into getting ready for Christmas! And we'll travel then too!

I can see a very quiet Jan coming up for me! :)

Balance is a vital part of life and I think we all need to balance our lives correctly. We need to seek the Lord for his help in balancing our life.

Proverbs 16:11 Honest scales and balances belong to the LORD; all the weights in the bag are of his making.

Sleep stealing culprits

Sleep! Is it as hard for you to get to sleep some nights as it is for me?  There are nights that I can not hold my eyes open by about 2 am.  :)  And then, other nights, I try the same things and stay awake half the night! 
I've talked about wind as a sleep stealing culprit .  What other things are culprits in your world of sleep? 

Caffeine can steel my sleep easily!  But, that's a common issue.

Another culprit to my sleeplessness is:   a social event late at night!  I guess I should expand on that one.  I have noticed that if I am out socially and I get 'riled' up, as in laughing, carrying on, talking a lot, I guess dancing would be among them if I could/would dance.  Going to a movie with my husband doesn't usually bother me because its not much different than watching a movie at home.  But, if it were a loud, action filled movie, it may keep me up.
A concert would definitely bother me!  I Have been to a total of maybe TWO concerts in my 15yr life w/RSD.  It was one of the activities that I cut out when I was first dxed to keep my pain as low as possible.  I have found it painful and the after affect pain is worse.
  Any kind of travel also causes sleep deprivation.  I wonder if I should get some sleeping pills for those nights I really need/want to do something and know it could keep me awake.  Doesn't matter how tired I get because of said activity...

Why would this happen do you think?   IMHO...I believe that our nerves get 'fired' up whenever we are active.  Do you notice it being harder to 'settle' down after being really active?  You are so so incredibly tired, but still can't sleep!  I have found I must relax IN BED for a long while before actually getting to sleep. So, why don't I go to bed earlier, take my meds, read or watch tv in bed till hubby comes to bed.  Hmmm....cause now we don't have cable in our bedroom and those dumb shows I want to watch are on till 11!  Thats typically why! But, I do hope to work my way earlier and earlier.  Right now, I fall asleep about 2, sometimes 3. On a rare occasion, I can fall asleep before 1am!

 Oh, and what if I go to bed early and having forgotten to put the dog out one last time?  I get up, go put him out and the nerves are starting to rev up again and it takes even longer.  I hate when I'm just about asleep for a nap and then must get up again!  The nap is sometimes a lost cause! 

Thanks for listening...and if you have anything you have figured out as a sleep stealing culprit please share it with us.

Oh my aching legs

My legs have been aching lately.  It seems like all the time anymore.  I lay in bed the other night and oh did they ever hurt.  Not really painful...just almost painful. So terribly uncomfortable that I couldn't sleep.  I had to take a bath to relieve the pressure on them, relieve the...ok...pain.  It worked. I wasn't in the tub for long when I was falling asleep.  I wish I had a blanket that I could just wrap around me that would alleviate this pressure! Wouldn't that be wonderful!?

Have you noticed that the changing of the Barometric Pressure bothers you?  I can get all kinds of issues that come along with the changing of seasons esp.   Like my leg aches!  Or, my whole body will ache! I'm noticing that it's a lot less of a problem since I've been on Cymbalta.  They say that's for Fibromyalgia, but one of the pains I've suffered from has been Fibromyalgia-like.  When I saw their commercial that explains Fibromyalgia it all clicked why some docs tried to say that's what I have.  Because it's the over-firing of the nerves in your muscles!  Makes sense, doesn't it, that our muscles ache like that too since RSD is the over-firing of  those same nerves (sympathetic) but for us, it's muscles, blood vessels, skin, organs, hair...

Anyway, to help when the barometric pressure gets to me, I hit the tub.  The water has to be 95 degrees or more so just going to a pool, etc doesn't really help.  I so would love to have a hot tub! With a tv!  oh what a dream! I used to have a soaking tub (and tv)which was mighty helpful!  We were going to put one in our new/old house but have decided with finances the way they are to hold off.  So this tub will have to do! 

To get the water up high enough in the tub to actually cover oneself and help:  I sometimes turn the water outlet cover upside down so it gives me a few more inches of water.  I also have a plastic outlet cover that does essentially the same thing.  It's easy to pop onto the outlet and off again to let the water out. 

I also found out yesterday why people with crowns shouldn't bite down on hard caramel!  Has anyone else had a lot of dental work since having RSD?  With the dry mouth from meds, etc my teeth have started rotting away!  I had a mouth of silver before RSD and now (granted I am getting old and so, this may have happened anyway) I only have one or two silver fillings left!  That's a treat!   But, I have recently learned about a gel that one puts on your gums and tongue and it keeps them moisened for a long time.  I keep it in my purse and pull it out when needed.  It's called BIOTENE.  Check that out!

Proverbs 21:23



Those who guard their mouths and their tongues keep themselves from calamity.